It is Okay to Not be Okay
I am trying to better myself emotionally. There are days where I get so overwhelmed with life that I have a panic attack or sometimes make myself sick. Some days I just want to isolate myself in my room and never leave. But, I cannot do that. I cannot just let my unhappy feelings take over my life. I cannot keep pushing my feelings aside instead of dealing with them. I cannot keep doing this to myself. I am admitting that I am not okay. And you know what? Sometimes you are not either but, that is okay. We are all human. Every one of us goes through a phase where we are sad or mad or frustrated. It’s a part of life. Today I just want to reassure you that your feelings matter and that it is okay to not be okay.
In our culture, it is not too keen for one to communicate and express one’s true feelings. Even though we all know what it is like to be stressed, overwhelmed and even sad, we do not like to admit it. We hate to admit that we are not okay yet, we all want someone that we can depend on when times are tough. Ironic, right? We as people do not want to feel like a burden on each other so we hold in as much as we can until we cannot anymore. We all are guilty for wanting someone to be there for us when we need them and expect sympathy and empathy. Sometimes life comes at us fast, and the emotions that we encounter with these moments should be dealt with rather than pushed away. One thing I have learned is that the more I resisted about dealing with my feelings, the worse it is for me to cope with them when I finally accept the fact that I am hurting. Whether you want to cry it out, talk it out, or maybe work it out, you need to find a coping mechanism to deal with them. Though I am bettering my coping mechanisms, (by trying to handle my problems sooner than later) I have not perfected it yet. Everyone has their own way of dealing with their feelings but these are just a few ways I deal with mine.
Cry. — Sometimes when I am overwhelmed and stressed, I cry. I have learned that it is okay to cry sometimes. In fact, sometimes crying is just what I need to do to feel better and relieved. Just like laughter, showing emotion is good for the soul. Crying has also been known to help regulate depression, anxiety and stress. So, cry, let it out.
Vent. —Out of all coping mechanisms, venting is probably the one I use the most. Venting is a great because allows me to release my pent-up thoughts or feelings. Communicate with whom you trust and allow yourself time to heal. Holding onto your built-up feelings will not allow you to heal. Once you talk it out, let it go and move on with your life.
Run. —Running helps me deal with my anger. Sometimes I cannot or do not want to express why I am angry so I just go until I cannot anymore. After a good run, I shower (duh) and wash all my anger and frustrations away. It is like I am working all my anger off and watching it wash down the drain. Not only does my body feel better (and clean) but, my mind is less cloudy and I am in a better mood.
Sleep. — Sleep is a vital part of our brain health; it plays a big role in keeping us sharp and staying balanced mentally and emotionally. Some days that I find myself upset or frustrated, I tend to lay down and take a 2-3-hour nap. Though I wake up groggy most of the time, I emotionally feel better. Sleep does not cure my problems but, it can help me make better decisions when I finally decide to face them.
Occupy time. — Whether it is listening to music, watching a sappy love story, or shopping, I try to occupy my time rather than just doing nothing. Give yourself time to heal but keep yourself busy. No one likes to get lost in their thoughts and sometimes you just need a little distraction to keep you going.
It is okay to be upset or confused or stressed but, realize that it is only going to last if you make it. Your feeling of not being okay is unavoidable but, allowing it to control your life is not. Try to handle your problems at hand because avoiding them will only make it worse. We are all not okay at some point in our lives but we should not let these emotions take over us. My last piece of advice for you today is to perceive bad days as a passing cloud—you can’t see the sun but you know eventually the sun will come out. Just remember better days are ahead.
With love, yours truly
-- NKT.
